Game Plan

Yes, I know. 2am game plan for an doctor's appointment that is in four days... not good. But I took everything that I'm meant to use and I'm still up, like a crackhead, planning for this appointment. Why oh WHY do antipsychotics mess with my sleep so much? What I plan on discussing with the Doctor are as follows:

Report Card:
Depakote: Surprisingly, so far, so good! Yeah, it makes me a little dizzy, but what won't? Feeling much less anxiety and more control.
Zyprexa: What a brilliant drug. I felt better within 30 minutes of the first dose. Almost no side effects. Lightheadedness when standing quickly, but that's it.

Abilify: we will increase to 10mg after my week on Zyprexa, starting with split dosing (one AM, one PM) until I'm finished with the 5mg prescription, and then just 1x at bedtime. Note to self: Abilify tablets will change from blue to pink for 10mg.

Question: can we keep Depakote (divalproex sodium) or will we switch to Trileptal (oxcarbazepine)? Dr Yasar indicated that Trileptal/Tegretol are the real heavy lifters for mood stabilization, and Trileptal has a better side effect profile. Both are generic, so I don't care either way, but will want clarification for next time. And so far, I really like the Depakote, so if I stay on that, that's fine as well.

Next order of business -
Abili-daze and the ability to work. Not happening so far. I can't focus even on reading a single magazine article, let alone answering confused people's questions about insurance. I need something to help me feel less dulled and dumbed. Discuss:
    1st choice: Dexedrine (dextroamphetamine sulfate) 10mg 2-3x daily p.r.n.#90
            OR
    2nd choice: Nuvigil (armodafinil) 250mg q.am.#30

 Nuvigil would run $79.26 monthly, but manufacturer's program brings it down to $29.26 and the first month is free. This is essentially the same as the Abilify offer I use now. Nuvigil will require prior auth from Medco.

Lastly - insomnia. Depakote and Zyprexa, while they make me dizzy, do not make me sleepy. On Sunday I woke up at 4:30am and never returned to sleep.That night, I could not fall asleep until after 2am on Monday. So am having both high sleep latency and early morning awakenings. The Sonata works well if I take it every time I'm needing to go back to bed. Would need higher dose/quantity 10mg 1-2 p.r.n. #60 monthly. If Dr Yasar is not willing to keep me on that, would be willing to try
    1st choice: Halcion (triazolam) .25mg 1-3x p.r.n.#90
            OR
    2nd choice: Catapres (clonidine) .02 mg 1-2x q.h.s.#60

The clonidine is one I'll only be wanting to take if I get a stimulant prescription. If I get neither of those, I'll go for the triazolam. So, all in all, I should leave Dr Yasar's office for an Rx for Abilify 10mg, and either Depakote or Trileptal. I'll want the triazolam to get myself some damn rest.

I am really, really hoping that I find my perfect drug cocktail soon. I want to feel well rested and calm and not like death is a better alternative. That would be great.